Having stoma surgery is life-changing, and for many, including myself, life-saving.
I’ll briefly set the scene and give you the background info. My stoma, ‘Stacey’, was formed in 2011, when I was 19 years old. I needed her due to severe Crohn’s disease (a form of Inflammatory Bowel Disease (IBD)) and due to a large, benign tumour on my colon, the size of a watermelon. Surgeons didn’t find this until they operated. If surgeons had left things even a few hours, I was told I wouldn’t be here, so she literally saved my life.
That being said, the festivities can be a time of year that bring up anxiety surrounding my stoma, and I know I’m not the only one. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. Anxiety and stress can affect the gut and cause changes in bowel habits such as frequency, consistency and indigestion, so it’s important to be aware of this.
In this blog post, I’m going to talk a little about the anxieties surrounding Christmas with a stoma and the things I do to help manage this.
Please note that this is with regards to my experiences living with an ileostomy and using a one-piece, drainable ostomy bag. Let’s get started.
Managing changes in routine
The festive period is a typical example of where normal routines can go to pot. This can create anxiety for me, especially when it comes to eating and drinking at different times and maybe eating different food/lots more food than normal.
I find it helpful to have lots of supplies ready organised, as is usual for me, and lay out the supplies I might need or put them in an easy to reach place so that when you might be extra tired or heading to bed late, they’re all already out for you to use. It’s one less thing to think about, which can make a big difference.
Stress around trying new foods
It can feel so tempting to dive in and eat everything and anything when your loved ones around you are indulging. In my experience, this doesn’t end well. I find if I’m going to try new food, then I usually try things one at a time, in a small portion and chew, chew, chew and hydrate. When I say one thing at a time, I don’t mean in the same sitting. I mean as in if you want to try something, make that the new food you try that day, then if a problem arises from it, you’re more likely to be able to identify what caused it.
Everyone with a stoma is different with what they can and can’t eat, but the typical “risky” foods to avoid at Christmas include rich foods such as Christmas pudding, nuts and raisins etc.
The stress of travel
If you’re heading away for Christmas, plan and prep like a boss! Checklists and accounting for taking more supplies with you can help ease the stress around being away from home. I’m an overpacker, so usually take away nearly double of what I’m going to need. This ensures I’ve got plenty of back up etc should leaks happen in close succession, which can happen when trying new foods etc at Christmas.
The more prepared you are, and ensuring you have the right products with you, can really help to alleviate a lot of the anxiety and stress surrounding being somewhere different at Christmas.
Managing hydration
Christmas often means indulging in more festive drinks and tipples, which definitely has caused me a lot of anxiety in the past. But then I realised, well I don’t HAVE to drink something that makes me anxious or uncomfortable. For me, it’s about steering clear of the things that may make me super anxious around falling ill such as more alcohol, and managing hydration is key. I do have a bit of alcohol over Christmas, but more the things I know I’m normally okay with, which is small amounts or sticking to drinks such as red wine. I know I fall ill with other alcoholic drinks, so I’d rather not risk it, and just minimise my anxiety. Again, everyone is different when it comes to alcohol with a stoma.
Worried about hydration? Speak to your stoma nurse for hydration tips. There are plenty of hydration solutions which you can include in your everyday routine at Christmas to help you stay on top of your hydration.
The stress around what to wear
This is something that can cause worry for a lot of ostomates, but the good news is, it doesn’t have to be. There are plenty of options for stoma support, such as stoma knickers, boxers and waistbands that can be worn under clothes for extra security, piece of mind and helping to minimise things such as bag bulges under clothes, which you may be worried about.
The importance of rest and relaxation
Setting time aside to rest and relax over the festive period is also key, especially when it comes to managing stress and anxiety. Even putting self-care time in place to do things such as journaling, mindfulness, taking a hot bubble bath, having a walk in nature or doing some gentle exercise such as yoga are all things that can help to manage stress and anxiety.
Choosing a simple and easy delivery service
Joining Respond has made my stoma life so much easier. Unless I let Respond know of any changes, they make sure my supplies are delivered each month, without me having to chase or wonder where things are. It’s so reassuring and one less thing for me to think about, especially when things feel overwhelming.
You’ll also receive their Connect magazine, which is full of handy tips, advice and reassuring words of support from those who have had stoma surgery.
Respond’s useful advice and support
Respond have a blog full of posts from other ostomates on their website. Some blog posts in their lifestyle section are:
- Self-care at Christmas – by me
- Managing your stoma over the festive period – by Maryrose
- Top tips for Christmas with a stoma – by Keith
In summary, having an ostomy around Christmas can present anxieties but it’s also a time that, with the right preparation, is enjoyable and something to celebrate. I wouldn’t be here without my ostomy, so being around to celebrate Christmas is something to celebrate in itself.
Everyone is different, but it’s important to remember that it’s such a personal journey for everyone who has stoma surgery. Every experience is valid. Every feeling matters. But there are so many other people out there who understand and are willing to help you, including myself.
For so many, including myself, having an ostomy wasn’t the end. It was just the beginning.
You can message me and follow me on my stoma journey on Instagram: @ibdwarriorprincess
